--
sssshhhh... our little secret... sssssshhhh...
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(12)
05:16:05 AM,Tuesday 25 December 2001
GOD JUL!!!!!!!
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03:19:31 PM,Monday 24 December 2001
am I the only one who thought that the google polar bears were playing with barbed wire the first ten times I went to it today?
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(4)
01:49:32 AM,Monday 24 December 2001
Martin reminded me of my silly netradio station. Moss has one, too, but I couldn't find it. His is damn good. But *mine* has the Bert and Ernie sheep tap-dancing song!
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10:40:30 PM,Sunday 23 December 2001
My parents named their dishwasher "Moaning Myrtle".
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10:20:55 PM,Sunday 23 December 2001
Hmmm... ok. Legolas, Elrond, and Saruman?
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(8)
10:10:03 PM,Sunday 23 December 2001
My brother just reminded me about something else. Here in Montana, they have a tire store, and they have radio promotions. To sell more tires, they give away meat. Meat! Meat! Meat! I don't think I'll buy any tires, though.
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(2)
07:10:33 PM,Sunday 23 December 2001
what do you know about snow-blindness?
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03:55:49 AM,Sunday 23 December 2001
Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat. Please put a penny in the...
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(5)
02:40:25 AM,Sunday 23 December 2001
T.I.A.I.L.W.: Ginette Neveu.
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02:26:05 AM,Sunday 23 December 2001
This is from the boy who uses "Uber" as a verb.
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(12)
09:59:54 PM,Friday 21 December 2001
"I mean guys like Roman. I used to think if you sat Roman on the Pope's shoulders you'd get the ten-foot pole you wouldn't want to touch anyone with! Heh-heh-heh."
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(2)
03:16:00 AM,Friday 21 December 2001
It seems like most of you haven't seen _The Lord of the Rings_ yet, so I won't say _anything_ about it. Not a word. No. Oh my god... I mean NO! Mum, mum, mum.
Instead, I will tell you how I pet a chinchilla.
How Mirabai Pet a Chinchilla,
by Mirabai Knight.
I pet a chinchilla today. It was soft. It was very scared. Then it ****ed on me. Then it ran away, but I caught it. We gave it a pretzel. I like chinchillas because they are soft.
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(7)
04:25:54 AM,Thursday 20 December 2001
My nephew -- muahahahaha! -- my nephew has a BLOG!!! Bow down, ye mighty, and despair!
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(6)
12:13:52 AM,Wednesday 19 December 2001
"Doubtless, my going on this whaling voyage formed part of the grand programme of Providence that was drawn up a long time ago. It came in as sort of brief interlude and solo between more extensive performances. I take it that this part of the bill must have run something like this:
"Grand Contested Election for the Presidency of the United States.
"Whaling Voyage by one Ishmael.
"BLOODY BATTLE IN AFFGHANISTAN."
-- Moby Dick
(something was said along these lines in 1997, too... freaky freaky...)
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(1)
03:56:18 AM,Tuesday 18 December 2001
This is my assignment for y'all, to celebrate the birth of Kerne's amazing blt on rye with a good sharp deli mustard and a firm kosher dill on the side... go far, far, back into your bloglet, months, years -- the buried depths -- and find one thread you wanna resurrect. Add a pithy comment to it. BLT and a bowl of chowder will find it and deliver it, fresh and gleaming, to the blogmass at large. Right? Set to!
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(2)
08:19:01 PM,Monday 17 December 2001
In high school, I had a 45 with Pat Boone singing "When the Swallows Come Back to Capistrano" on it. Damnit.
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05:32:23 AM,Monday 17 December 2001
This is about toothpaste.
Today I went into one of those freaky bulk-up-with-herbs-and-crystal-resonators stores and saw a tube of toothpaste, originally $13.99, on sale for $3.50. And, looking at the label, it didn't mention mint. Of course, when a tube of toothpaste doesn't say what flavor it is, but includes "natural flavor" on the ingredients, it's always mint, nearly, but {sigh} what the hell, I said. So I bought it. The packaging said: "I thank you, my new girl friend thanks you, and Hollywood thanks you!" George M. Cohan paste. Who can resist? And it was Clinically proven effective at the California Breath Clinics [tm]. Awright, now, when I took it home, I open it and squeeze. Nuttin'. Damn nuttin'. I bash it up against the sink, and gnaw on it and blow into it, and nuttin'. I cut the bastard open with my ma's scissors, and GUH! three ounces of nasty nasty foul liquid torrent over my hands. There's about three gumballs' worth of even fouler library-paste jammed in the top of it. Now half my body and the whole damn bathroom smell of the stuff... smells like a healthy mixture of airplane cement and rancid cottage cheese. Oh, and mint.
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03:37:36 AM,Monday 17 December 2001
FORTY YEARS ago, at the Norwegian Seaman's Church of Los Angeles, Robert Karma Knight and Karin Meland were wedded in holy matrimony. Bloody amazing, innit?
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(9)
06:19:39 AM,Sunday 16 December 2001
