Bloglet, the gentleman's mock turtle soup -- Moss made it sweeter than myrrh ash and dhoup
Current Music: Piazzolla -- Fugata Tango
Current Mood: Insomniac
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(2)
05:45:21 PM,Wednesday 23 June 2004
Among the bitter ranks of the unwiggling? Don't despair -- there's hope!
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04:53:03 PM,Wednesday 23 June 2004
Sluice out the slubbard and pour me a pottle --
I feel as sexy as Gussie Fink-Nottle!
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04:31:23 PM,Wednesday 23 June 2004
A month and a day. The cumulative lifespans of forty thousand gnats.
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02:24:00 PM,Wednesday 23 June 2004
I've got a brace of Nehrings! And very welcome they are, too.
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(2)
11:15:05 PM,Tuesday 22 June 2004
Got my hair cut today. It's always a bit of a tricky operation, 'cause it seems like I can't ever get my ordinary old fashioned little boy's haircut (even if I ask for one) unless my barber actually thinks I'm a little boy. Whenever they figure out I'm a chick, I always wind up with a dyke spike, and it just ain't my thing. Problem is, I've never been able to consistently do the boy trick on command. I think it's 'cause, whenever a person gets even a subconscious impression that you're trying to put one over on them, they sharpen up and start noticing things more clearly than they otherwise would. So I don't change my voice or mannerisms or do anything in particular that I wouldn't do in my daily life. Today I didn't even wear a button down shirt -- just a white t-shirt with a photo of the Going-to-the-Sun road on it. But it turned out that I was in luck.
"So, where do you go to school?" he asked, tucking the drape under my chin.
"Uh... I'm not in school right now," I said.
"Yeah, I know, but where do you go during the school year?"
"No, I mean, I graduated from college two years ago."
"WHAT?!" He busted up laughing. "You? College? How old are you?"
"Twenty-three," I said, half way between blushing and stifling a grin. I always look girlier when I smile, and I didn't want him to figure out my secret until the haircut was finished, at least.
"Man, you've got some guts," he said, not believing a word. He went on to ask me my name, where I grew up, what my degree was in, what I do -- the subject got on my move to New York, and I told him about my girlfriend.
"Let me guess. You met her on the computer, huh?"
"Well... yeah."
"Does she look twelve, too?"
"Naw," I said, smirking my ass off. "Only about seventeen."
Everything I told him was god-to-honest true, except I didn't make a point of correcting him when he started jawing to the other customer waiting in the armchair.
"You hear this kid? He says he's twenty-three! If I actually believed him, I'd buy him a beer. Haw haw!"
Victory. He gave me the whole treatment, too -- neck shave with a straight razor, nice-smelling spritz water, some kinda electric vibrating shoulder thumper... and when I was through, we were both laughing like nutcases.
"I promise, dude! I'm not lying! Here, I'll show you my driver's license."
He took it and looked it over. "Well, whaddaya know... 1981. This kid, I tell ya." The other guy shrugged and smiled. "Hey, you want a sucker?"
"Hell yeah, I want a sucker." He gave me a blue one. And a comb. And a ballpoint pen with the shop's address on it.
If he noticed the "F", he didn't give any indication of it. We talked a bit about the ammunition he sold under the counter and the nice big elk rack on the wall. I paid and went my way. In the middle of it all, he'd said,
"I bet you'll never come back here, after the ragging I'm giving you, huh?"
"You kidding? This is the best haircut I've ever had."
And it is, too.
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(1)
08:37:19 PM,Tuesday 22 June 2004
I know everyone and his kinkajou is doing this, but, well, so am I. I've got two gmail invites. Want one?
(my address, by the way, is askeladden at you-know-where)
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(11)
11:05:34 AM,Monday 21 June 2004
Summer Reading Goal Update
Tuesday June 8 to Monday June 14:
Hours of Television: ~2 (an hour and fifty minutes)
Books: 2 (The Lucifer Society, by various authors, and Three Gothic Novels -- The Castle of Otranto by Horace Walpole, Vathek by William Beckford, and Frankenstein by Mary Shelley.)
Tuesday June 15 to Present:
Hours of Television: ~2 (an hour and forty minutes)
Books: 2 (The Talented Mr. Ripley by Patricia Highsmith and Baudolino by Umberto Eco)
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(4)
10:53:42 AM,Saturday 19 June 2004
Yes, I know I'm short of profundities lately. It's the weather. Don't worry. Things are brewing. Blog will resume its ordinary ponderous pontificating soon enough. Meanwhile:
O.o.C.Q.o.t.D.: "If someone gave me a glass of claret that color I'd pour it out while they weren't looking, presuming it was half full of Tang."
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(3)
03:47:03 PM,Friday 18 June 2004
Bleah! Gross! I just ate bugs! Dead bugs! Man, why didn't I learn my lesson when that happened to me in elementary school? When your mother buys that hippie-ass organic cereal and leaves it on the shelf for months, you get BUGS. And then you eat them. And then you stare down at your bowl and see that you're eating them and go, "Bleah! Gross!" But the first time it happens you don't have a blog, so you can't warn the populace: hippie-ass organic cereal lacks vital preservatives and pesticides intended to reduce the incidence of spontaneous generation in your foodstuffs. AVOID IT LIKE POISON. Stick to fluorescent sugar bombs, is my advice. Man. Bleah. Gross.
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(6)
09:58:44 AM,Thursday 17 June 2004
Gott in himmel I despise myself but I WANT one. I would go swimming every day. I swear. In fact, I might take up permanent aquatic residence. What an unconscionable waste of money. What a beautiful beautiful shiny little thing.
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(1)
09:29:00 AM,Thursday 17 June 2004
Happy Bloomsday! Readings all over town, hourly, from 8:00am to midnight. I'm gonna try and catch some of 'em, but I'll have to sleep eventually. That's awright, though; I didn't get quite halfway through the book on this last try (I'll pick it up again soon. Honest.), so I don't want it spoiled for me anyway. No kidneys for breakfast. Oh well.
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(7)
09:15:21 AM,Wednesday 16 June 2004
I saw a beaver! It was swimming in the middle of the Clarkfork while I was crossing the bridge, and then drifted over to the shore, where I could see it from an absolutely perfect bird's-eye view. It munched on some leaves and twigs and things. It was totally a beaver. Rule.
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(11)
10:33:49 AM,Tuesday 15 June 2004
her: i have to admit i think aristotle was a little bit of an asshat
her: i hope that won't be a huge problem between us
me: grrr
her: *sigh*
me: {bares teeth}
her: trouble in paradise
me: right, the whole thing's off
her: damn. i knew you were gonna say that.
me: hee hee
me: word for word?
me: (`;
her: right. next!
her: *snerk*
her: word for freakin' word, my love.
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(1)
06:43:08 AM,Tuesday 15 June 2004
Flippin' ecstatic. As usual. But especially so. Flippin' ecstatic.
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07:28:53 PM,Monday 14 June 2004
Exodus 4:10
{smirk}
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(9)
09:10:10 PM,Sunday 13 June 2004
I need something like this, only for the city I mean to be moving to. Though I suppose a savvy native will do just as well. And I'm lucky enough to be readily equipped with one of those. So woo.
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09:04:55 PM,Sunday 13 June 2004
Rain, rain, stay right here.
Go ahead and rain all year.
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(1)
11:23:29 AM,Thursday 10 June 2004
