Bloglet, the gentleman's mock turtle soup -- Moss made it sweeter than myrrh ash and dhoup
Our tutor said "tumescence" in seminar tonight.
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11:17:29 PM,Thursday 11 October 2001
My precept (Plato Symposium & Lysias) has got six people in it, counting me and the tutor. And one boy.
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(1)
07:17:38 PM,Wednesday 10 October 2001
Jezebel Friday Knight, 1999? - 2001
Pandinus Imperator African Dream Scorpion
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(5)
02:07:07 AM,Wednesday 10 October 2001
But this makes me happy.
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(1)
07:48:21 PM,Tuesday 9 October 2001
Too many people have been yelling at each other today. It's no good.
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07:38:09 PM,Tuesday 9 October 2001
Bought the new Leonard Cohen album today. Think I like it, or at least bits of it. Going to the Eumenides seminar now. It's COOOOLD here! Max is curled up in her house. Almost finished the Decameron... four stories left. Boogie Street is the best song on the album so far. Didn't y'all like that cartoon the other day? Hell, I did. Pish. Tosh. Bullwash. Wimple. Bisy Backson.
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(1)
04:55:57 PM,Tuesday 9 October 2001
Mark Twain and Sholom Aleichem
by Edward Field
Mark Twain and Sholom Aleichem went one day to Coney Island --
Mark wearing a prison-striped bathing costume and straw hat,
Sholom in greenish-black suit, starched collar, beard,
Steel-rimmed schoolmaster glasses, the whole works,
And an umbrella that he flourished like an actor,
Using it sometimes to hurry along the cows
As he described scenes of childhood in the billage in Poland,
Or to spear a Jew on a sword like a cossack.
Sitting together on the sand among food wrappers and lost coins,
They went through that famous dialogue
Like the vaudeville routine After-you-Gaston:
"They tell me you are called the Yiddish Mark Twain."
"Nu? The way I heard it, you are the American Sholom Aleichem."
And in this way passed a pleasant day admiring each other,
The voice of the old world and the voice of the new.
"Shall we risk the parachute jump, Sholom?"
"Well, Markele, am I properly dressed for it?
Better we should go in the water a little maybe?"
So Sholom Aleichem took off shoes and socks (with holes -- a shame),
Rolled up stiff-serge pants, showing his varicose veins;
And Mark Twain, his bathing suit moth-eaten and gaping
In important places, lit up a big cigar,
And put on a pair of waterwings like an angel.
The two great writers went down where the poor
Were playing at the water's edge
Like a sewer full of garbage, warm as piss.
Around them shapeless mothers and brutal fathers
Were giving yellow, brown, white, and black children
Lessons in life that the ignorant are specially qualified to give:
Slaps and scoldings, mixed with food and kisses.
Mark Twain, impetuous goy, dived right in,
And who could resist splashing a little the good-natured Jew?
Pretty soon they were both floundering in the sea
The serge suit ruined that a loving daughter darned and pressed,
The straw hat floating off on the proletarian waters.
They had both spent their lives trying to make the world a better place
And both had gently faced their failure.
If humor and love had failed, what next?
They were both drowning and enjoying it now,
Two old men of the two world, the old and the new,
Splashing about in the sea like crazy monks.
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(3)
03:24:57 PM,Tuesday 9 October 2001
I want an Edsel.
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03:12:02 PM,Tuesday 9 October 2001
Cars have fenders; people have necks.
Loans have lenders; people have checks.
Sunlight has splendor; people have specs.
Mail has senders; people have Fed-ex.
Margaritas have blenders; people have Tex-Mex.
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(3)
11:43:44 AM,Tuesday 9 October 2001
That was terrifying. I accidentally went to http://m14.net/bloglet.php -- and I sit there, stupified, thinking Moss sold out...
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(3)
11:35:52 AM,Tuesday 9 October 2001
I've had two dreams about Harry Potter. One last night. Lots of chamber music, strangely... the Dursleys had some fetish about it... Uncle Vernon played the cello very badly, and sang baritone... and I was Harry and had to do something on a lute or something... and I got mad and I think Uncle Vernon's cello exploded. Not sure. But it was grand. The two great things I've found about the movie are that the kid who plays Dudley Dursley is Patrick Troughton's grandson, and card #2 in the Harry Potter Famous Wizards and Witches, Alchemists and Druids, Shamans and Magicians trading card set is -- Paracelsus! So there! phew.
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(6)
05:03:39 AM,Monday 8 October 2001
And this illustrates what one finds when one goes looking for random Belgian strangers at one in the morning:
"Hi there! My name is André and I really love to wear this pair of tight black Leather Pants. I wear it everyday I can. This Leather Pants was made by an italian craftsman with a very soft and floppy spanish half plonged lamb skin. This quality of Leather gives an excellent comfort and is high sheen as I like. There's a soft black satin lining inside. I love the look and the smell of hot leather against my skin. And when I walk down the streets, I love to see the the people looking my shiny legs."
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03:52:39 AM,Monday 8 October 2001
So who here has ever been roused out of a warm bed at one in the morning on a school night by the sudden overpowering urge to go find a stranger from Belgium to speak to? Show of hands, please.
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03:45:43 AM,Monday 8 October 2001
And they wonder why the DotCom companies went bust?!
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02:00:18 AM,Monday 8 October 2001
Quiz. Which of the following doesn't exist (as far as I've been able to find):
a. M*A*S*H slash
b. Sonic the Hedgehog slash
c. Don Quixote slash
d. Chicken Run slash
e. Laurel and Hardy slash
f. Douglas Adams slash
g. Narnia slash
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(16)
05:38:47 PM,Sunday 7 October 2001
The Creation gave me the hiccups. And God (hic!) created great (hic!) whales.
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04:28:07 AM,Sunday 7 October 2001
Think of them as home-bred quails, neckless dancers, dwarves, snippets of sheep-sh*t, lovers of fancy footwork. They're both dainty-eating gorgons, skate-watching harpies, shameful old-maid-scarers, smelly-armpit fish-annihilators.
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03:25:05 AM,Sunday 7 October 2001
Good evening. Tonight on Algebra Theatre we have the international Bloglet premiere of "Excerpts from the St. John's Senior Math Manual".
"(52) y=wh[b(t-vx/c^2)]
(53) x=(wx+v/1+wxv/c2)t
Substitute this expression for x into (52) and shake vigorously,
y=whb(t-v((wx+v/1+wxv/c^2)/c^2)t)
y=whbt(1-v((wx+v/1+wxv/c^2)/c^2))
y=whbt(1-v((vwx+v^2/c^2+wxv/c^2)/c^2))
y=whbt(1-(vwx+v^2/c^2+wxv))
y=whbt(c^2+wx+v-vwx-v^2/c^2+
wxv)
y=whbt(c^2-v^2/c^2+vwxv)
y=whbt(1-v^2/c^2/1+vwxv/c^2)"
Thank you, and tune in next week to another exciting episode of Algebra Theater. I'm your host, Algernon Muqabala, for Procrastino Productions.
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02:05:05 AM,Sunday 7 October 2001
Last seminar, my tutors decided that I should write my senior essay on Thomas Aquinas. This, frankly, terrifies me. I mean, I wanted hardcore... but... aieeee! They said either a paper on Being and Essence that I haven't read yet, or a bit of the Summa that reasons about faith. They decided I need to do my essay on faith, and Thomas speaks to the place where I am, currently. I can't do it on Leibniz, 'cause he's too hard. I can't do it on Marx or Hegel 'cause they're too intimidating. Plotinus is a possibility. It might be good for the life-blood of the program to have a paper on Plotinus. "But it must be something metaphysical and systematic," they tell me. "Oh," I whimper.
(why can't I do it on Aristophanes?)
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(12)
12:29:02 AM,Sunday 7 October 2001
If you could write, direct, and play the title role in a wildly inaccurate, sensationalized dramatization of the life of some obscure historical figure, who would it be? Mine: Johann Ernst Altenburg.
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(8)
11:24:03 PM,Saturday 6 October 2001